When I fantasized about retirement, I imagined I’d do pushups every morning, make pasta from scratch, maybe even Marie Kondo my closets, if I had time between all the volunteering and reading. What did I actually do? I sat on my couch, binge-watched 90 Day Fiancé, and asked myself, “Retirement? What the hell was I thinking?”
The problem? I had no idea how much of me was my job. Without the structure, purpose and identity my work gave me, I felt lost. I was in need of a midlife reinvention. So, like we do, I went in search of books by folks who had figured midlife out.
I found science-y books for older people about things like the aging brain and neuroplasticity. I found some lovely, inspirational books, like Julia Cameron’s It’s Never Too Late to Begin Again. I found midlife-crisis books and Suze Orman–type financial advice books. But what I couldn’t find back in early 2019 were funny books, books about how wild it is to move from working every day of your whole life to spending your days on your couch in your nightie watching reality television, knowing you need to make a life of it somehow.
So, recognizing the need for books that speak to the chaos and possibility of midlife reinvention, I set out to write one. And because we all need a dose of humor with our learning, I tried to make it funny. Then other writers — ones who probably went on the same book hunt as I did — published funny midlife books of their own.
So if you’re in the middle of a midlife reinvention yourself, yes, go to a therapist. But on the way home, swing by your favorite indie bookshop and pick up one of these recent(ish) midlife transition books, each one guaranteed to make you both laugh and think.
How the Hell Did I Not Know That? My Midlife Year from Couch to Curiosity by Lucie Frost
[Yeah, that’s my book. Is it self-serving to list my book first? I say “no” because I oh-so-cleverly sorted the list in date order, and mine just happens to be the most recently published. Isn’t that convenient?]
My book is billed as “a witty memoir and trivia-filled romp about using the power of curiosity to find meaning in midlife.”
Library Journal liked it, but warned (wisely) that I have a foul mouth: “VERDICT: A memoir laced with humor and profanity that will draw readers in and keep them turning the pages as they learn facts about various subjects and the spirited Frost’s struggles and triumphs in navigating midlife.” So yeah, it’s not the book for anyone of delicate ear.
There’s an audiobook too, if you just can’t sit still long enough to read (oh girl, I feel ya!).
I'm Wearing Tunics Now: On Growing Older, Better, and a Hell of a Lot Louder by Wendi Aarons
Wendi is a humor writer who has written for just about everyone — The New Yorker, McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, BuzzFeed, The Wall Street Journal and on and on. She’s an accomplished writer, for sure, but she’s also funny as hell. In this book, she writes about all the midlife indignities with humor and honesty. She also gives us insight into how to look forward, follow our dreams and even start over. You’ll love it, I swear.
Excuse Me While I Disappear: Tales of Midlife Mayhem by Laurie Notaro
You probably know Laurie from her five (!) New York Times bestselling books. This one didn’t reach that status, but it’s good nevertheless. Reviews agree, like the one from Library Journal (which made me laugh because it includes a profanity warning, just like the one for my book did), which notes the book “help[s] readers transition from adult to older adult with sage advice, raucous laughs, and just the right amount of potty-mouthed language.”
I'll Show Myself Out: Essays on Midlife and Motherhood by Jessi Klein
Jessi was the head writer and executive producer of Inside Amy Schumer, to give you a sense of her type of funny. The book, a collection of interconnected essays, was a New York Times bestseller and made many of the 2022 best-of lists. It explores motherhood, but also the humiliations, poignancies and possibilities of midlife.
Midlife Bites: Anyone Else Falling Apart, or Is It Just Me? by Jen Mann
In this book, Jen Mann (of People I Want to Punch in the Throat fame) writes about all sorts of midlife concerns, including things like finding your purpose, learning to make new friends and moving out of your comfort zone. It’s a “no-BS collection of essays,” the jacket copy promises.
Did I Say That Out Loud? Midlife Indignities and How to Survive Them by Kristin Van Ogtrop
In this essay collection, Kristin, who is the former editor of Real Simple, reminds us midlifers to acknowledge all we have lost (Innocence! Unbridled optimism! Smooth skin!), but to relish all that we’ve gained (Self-actualization! Confidence! Gratitude!). The book is funny, poignant and inspiring.
I Miss You When I Blink: Essays by Mary Laura Philpott
I tried to keep this list to books published since 2020, but I simply couldn’t leave this one off the list. Besides, the paperback came out in March 2020, so let’s say it counts.
Quieter than the other books on this list, this essay collection is absolutely beautiful. Mary Laura did everything the way it was supposed to be done. And then she looked back on her life and realized that following the rules had not made her content. Mary Laura talks about how we can reinvent ourselves, not just at midlife, but throughout our lives, and helps show us how. I couldn’t recommend this book more.
So get to reading. Get to laughing. And when you’re the new midlife you, reach out and tell me all about it.
