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The Force Awakens

The (Crackpot) Theories You Need as We Countdown to Star Wars

in Potpourri by

Our nerdy little hearts are thrumming like the Millennium Falcon kicking into hyper drive as we count down to Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens epic opening December 18. To share our excitement as we wait, two members of our Nerd Squad—Word Nerd and the Scarlet Pencil—have agreed to share their, um…creative…theories about the movie with you and let the rest of us get back to watching the Funny or Die Star Wars Christmas Special. While there are no true spoilers here, be forewarned. They may actually stumble upon something that could be true. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day. WHERE THE HELL IS LUKE? Could anyone have possibly missed that the last Jedi has only been…

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The Force Awakens with a New Star Wars Trailer and Tells Us Little — Fortunately!

in Fiction by

The new Star Wars: The Force Awakens trailer gives fans a lot to geek out about. We saw Daisy Ridley’s Rey spelunking in an abandoned star destroyer. We saw the beginning of what promises to be an emotional lightsaber battle between John Boyega’s Finn and Adam Driver’s helmetless Kylo Ren. We even saw a robotic hand, probably Luke Skywalker’s, touching R2-D2. We aren’t breaking any new ground by saying that these details are all kind of a big deal. However, the very best thing about the new trailer is that, even with 2 minutes and 35 seconds worth of new footage, we still have no real idea what the movie is going to be about. It’s comforting to know that…

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